If I ever like your sad post
It is support
I am not enjoying your tears
my mum just told me to “stop being so depressed all the time”
when you write a sentence and it rhymes
why does the picture make perfect sense
i don’t understand why people don’t instantly respond to “what would your dream superpower be” with the ability to manipulate probability.
think about it. what’s the chance someone will drop 1mil in front of me? 0%? let’s make that 100%. what’s the probability i’ll wake up tomorrow and be X gender? 100%. what’s the probability my bathtub is filled with mac and cheese? 100%.
This is genius
waking up cold: alright I need more blankies
waking up hot: covers thrown everywhere. sweat behind the kneecaps. 3 dead. the pillow is the sun. critical condition.
i love when dogs sigh. its like, hey bud, long day at the office?
*opens blank tab* yes mom im doing my homework leave me alone dont you trust me at all
you could read this from right to left or left to right and it doesnt matter. it doesnt matter
omfg straight boys complaining about high waisted shorts and crop tops… have you SEEN a girl in high waisted shorts and crop tops?????? have u seen girls’ LEGS in high waisted shorts!???? have u seen a little peek of tummy in a crop top???????? what is WRONG WITH YOU
i think straight boys might be gay
of course they are, stick a drywipe marker pen within 5 yards of them see how long it takes them to draw a dick on something
Let me tell you what the most annoying thing in Urban Fantasy is.
It’s patented Strong Female Characters double-subverting their emancipation. They spend all their time kicking ass and taking names, and then…
i love the Women Against Feminism that are like “I dont need feminism because i can admit i need my husband to open a jar for me and thats ok!” cause listen 1. get a towel 2. get the towel damp 3. put it on the lid and twist. BAM now men are completely useless. you, too, can open a jar. time to get a divorce